Making the wifi work is more valuable than making fire. That’s just the way the modern world is. The idea of what a high-value man is changes over time. But some of the traits we value in a man are embedded in our biology, and those stay the same. So here are the qualities that make a high-value man today and how you can cultivate them.
The idea of a high-value man never needed to be articulated. In prehistoric times, men who could bring home a kill or protect their family from wild animals were highly valued.
Some might even argue that there is no such thing anymore or that trying to define it is pointless. But here at Face Dragons, we want to equip people with the tools to thrive and stand and face the most terrible dragons that life will throw at us all. The skills below do that.
- Look for the Bullet Point – Of course, you don’t need to hit every one of these points to become a high-value man, but if you work toward these ideas, perhaps one at a time, you won’t go far wrong. For that reason, I’ve included a bullet point with an action you can start today to get you closer to your ideal.
Table of Contents
- Why You Should Strive to Be a HVM
- 9 High Value Traits You Can Cultivate Today
- High Value Men Examples
Why You Should Strive to Be a HVM
What’s the Alternative?
If you’re not high value, you’re mediocre at best or even low value. Is that who you want to be?
Women Want High Value Men
Sexual selection in humans is done by women. They let the men compete among themselves for status and then choose from those at the top of the dominance hierarchy. Although high levels of testosterone may not be the deciding factor in success in many aspects of men’s lives, there’s no doubting it’s role in health, muscle to fat ratio and confidence.
Although men are no longer competing with hunting skills, they are still being chosen by the opposite sex for their perceived value.
HVM Are More Content with Their Lives
Studies have show that people with low self esteem are much more likely to experience symptoms of depression, some showing that 50% of those with low self esteem show signs of depression.
But self esteem isn’t something you can pull out of thin air. It’s the result of years of work that create a sense of worth and self value.
9 High Value Traits You Can Cultivate Today
1. High-Value Men Know Where They’re Going
When you meet a high-value man, one of the first things that strike you is his focus on his goals. He knows what he wants, and he’s going for it.
It might feel like some people are born like that, but you can be that guy too. Here’s how.
David Allen, the author of GTD, puts it this way, “Rather than starting where you want to be, we suggest you start where you are.”
You probably think of David and his productivity system GTD as a task management system, but that’s only half of it.
The other half focuses on figuring out what you should do; he calls this perspective.
- Do This Today: Set one goal and commit to it.
- Keep Building Value: Create a life management system.
2. A High-Value Man Looks Masculine
Ever noticed that when sports figures or musicians get their big break and their first big paycheck, they buy a whole new wardrobe? (Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten Connor McGregor’s infamous pinstripe suit!) It’s because the clothes maketh the man.
It’s not just about looking good for Instagram posts or your next Tinder profile; no, looking masculine is more than skin deep; let me explain.
A high-value male should look:
- Healthy
- Strong
- Confident
- Have Good Posture
- And Be Well Dressed
The first two points above, healthy and strong, are about your physical body. It’s not only that people are more attracted to healthy people (ever been grossed out by someone coughing and sneezing next to you?), but healthy people take less time off work and ultimately make more money.
That’s why every millionaire will tell you to start going to the gym. A healthy body and healthy mind equals better decisions and making better decisions a better life.
The last three points are about what you do with what you have. You can look good when out of shape, but don’t expect to look super masculine if you wear unisex clothes. What are unisex clothes?
- T-Shirts
- Jeans
- Hoodies
- Anything which isn’t strictly male clothing
When you have chunky arms, you’ll look masculine in anything, but when you don’t, you’ll need to break out some manly clothes; check out this article on How to Look More Masculine for tips.
- Do This Today: Swap out your T-Shirt for a polo shirt with a collar.
- Keep Building Value: Build a masculine capsule wardrobe
3. He’s Financially Successful
If you can cut someone open and perform open heart surgery, you will get paid accordingly. If you can consistently sell people high-ticket items like cars or houses, you’ll have money. It’s that simple.
For the most part, people get paid what they’re worth.
So if you don’t make much money right now or don’t make any, you must ask yourself, “How much am I worth?”
Don’t lie to yourself and answer with what you could do; most people could be a surgeon or car salesman if they learned (a car salesman is one of the worst jobs for introverts, though). If you’ve never sold a car, it’s not real yet.
If you realize you have no valuable skills, there is a simple way to get rich. It won’t get you paid tomorrow but it will ensure that you’re making good money in 10 years.
- Do This Today: Decide on a high paid job and work towards it every day.
That might sound simplistic, but it really is that simple. You know that certain jobs are well paid:
- Salesmen
- Coders
- Lawyers
- Accountants
- etc.
So if you spend your free time every day working on becoming one of them, you’ll make good money in a few years. Or you can sit around hoping something happens.
- Keep Building Value: Build a side hustle that could turn into a business.
4. Someone Who Knows Who He Is
Want to be a high-value individual? Understanding who you are is critical. When you know who you are, how you think, and why you behave the way you do, you have the keys to change and personal growth.
If you don’t know who you are or why you do what you do, you’re just living on autopilot; you might think you’re in charge, but you’re not. You’ve become a real-life NCP.
- Do This Today: Take a personality test to understand you’re personality type and where you stand on the socio-sexual hierarchy.
- Keep Building Value: Figure out what part your personality plays in what you do, especially your bad habits.
5. He Is Patient and Gives
There are plenty of people who are rich and highly skilled but don’t give off that high value vibe. If you’re a jerk to people, you’ll never be considered worth anyone’s time.
There’s something extra special about a busy successful person, giving their time, energy and money to help those less fortunate or to give back to the community.
Being high value doesn’t simply mean you’re worth a lot, you have to be worth something to others, which means giving back. It might be directly with spending time and money, but it might be in the products and services you create.
Elon Musk’s Tesla is one way in which he is high value, he created a company that revolutionized an industry to move us away from a reliance on using petrol to power our cars.
- Do This Today: Spend 15 minutes doing something for someone who wouldn’t expect it.
- Keep Building Value: Find a charity or cause you care about and commit your time to it.
6. He’s Stable and Consistent
One thing that differentiates a high-value male from a low-value one is stability.
A man who flip-flops between frantic busywork and languished inactivity doesn’t give the feeling to others that he’s valuable.
But someone with the qualities to stay consistent even when things don’t go his way will eventually create stability. Stability is different from someone who’s just predictable and boring. You can be spontaneous while staying consistent. Instead, it shows you’re reliable.
- Do This Today: Decide on one goal that you will work on everyday till it’s complete.
- Keep Building Value: Create a vision of your future and start putting in place the pieces to get you there.
7. He Doesn’t Need to Lie
People lie for many reasons.
- They fear the consequences of telling the truth
- They are ashamed of the truth
- They lie to get something (or someone) they don’t deserve
But someone comfortable with who they are and courageous enough to stand up to dragons can tell the truth. He knows he can handle the results and that the truth will push him to improve.
When you lie about your alcohol dependence, for example, you’re telling yourself you’re fine as you are. This robs you of the opportunity to make a change.
- Do This Today: Don’t lie.
- Keep Building Value: Live out what you believe.
8. He’s Dangerous
Jordan Peterson makes this point when on the Joe Rogan Experience. Men, especially moral men, should have the capacity for violence; in his words, “You should be a monster!” after a bit of pushback from Joe, Dr. Peterson explains why.
The idea is that if you want to be good, you might have to fight demons or face dragons!
You must be willing to stand up for what you believe to be correct, and you can’t do that if you’re weak; you’ll just get argued into submission.
- Do This Today: Choose a martial art to start learning.
- Keep Building Value: Decide on a new goal in the gym and create a program that will get you there.
Even if you never have to use it. The fact that you can back up what you believe will change how you communicate for the better.
9. He’s a Master of His Craft
Have you mastered anything? It doesn’t matter what, but a master of a craft understands what it takes to be successful. He goes into any new venture expecting to work hard to get a result. Competence in one realm often translates into others.
Mastering a craft usually means about ten years of hard work; here are some examples:
- Getting a black belt
- Becoming a master carpenter
- Mastering a foreign language
- Becoming a master chef
- Building a successful business
Mastering a craft doesn’t have to be what you do for work. In fact, high-value men should have more than one string to their bow and spend some time doing things they enjoy.
- Do This Today: Find a pastime or hobby you enjoy.
- Keep Building Value: Create a stretch goal to master it quicker
High Value Men Examples
Broxh
Broxh is a wood carver and gamer from New Zealand who streams on Twitch. He creates beautiful decorative wood carvings inspired by his Maori culture. Broxh gained notoriety after turning off his donations during Christmas, “it just made sense to turn it off at the time because it’s about using your money on your own family.”
- A true master of his craft
- Broxh is stable and consistnet
- He’s patient and gives
Captain Sinbad
Nikhil Pandey,creator of the Captain Sinbad YouTube Channel is an actor turned comedian turned lifestyle guru and film maker. His videos span productivity, motivation, comedy sketches and life advice and business tips. Originally created to give Nikhil a place to showcase his acting ability, Captain Sinbad has become a large brand in its own right.
- He’s honest, even about his weaknesses
- He built a successful business
- He’s goal oriented and focused on self improvement
Frank Tedesco
Frank is a pianist and musician who makes content primarily on YouTube and Twitch. His YouTube videos often feature him and his musically incline friends taking song requests on Omegle and playing them by ear. But what makes Frank a high value man?
- He’s a master of his craft (music.)
- He owns a successful online business.
- He always looks well groomed and put together.
- He’s confident and kind to the people he talks to.
